Great Oak

I wish this break was summer and tents were good for sleeping, perhaps I’d get lost for awhile. Perhaps I’d stand completely still and feel my arms and legs take flight in to the earth and sky. A virtual transformation of flesh to bark, feeling a rush of wind down my throat metamorphosing speech for the sweet sound of pure silence. Feeling the winds sing song through the canopy of what was once me.

I was meant to be an oak tree.

i could go on wondering, but i think i'd rather not
everything's a circle, time is never locked
if i drew a picture, and marked you as a dot
would you be revolving or has your movement stopped?

hmm poetry is lost to me.

A masque or raid the audience screams

softly to reflect too deft the clumsy strings

hung neatly on folds behind the scenes

overlapping distracting

happiness in a pair

 singled out

masked as an attack

past.

Presently playing strings swiftly

slowly the puppeteer leads tender hearts

deftly lacking strength to walk away

or just stay.

Anger mimics bilingually

happy to be a mistaken interpretation.

Universal language unknown love

is indefinable between two actors

blindfolded by past masques

depicting  faces fallacies foes

cyclically caught between

viral plays for affection

known only by a façade

fit for folly.

Words too confined to fit the space

needed for unified understanding.

Language lacking depth to destroy misrepresentation.

This world is a Masque

Love Fear Hate Trust Lust are the Masks.

We are the Puppeteers, the Puppets, the Audience.

One to lead, one to deceive, one to understand.

after school
a cement road
divides 
separate sets of trees 
and
a stream.

right down the middle
i walk
thoughts drift off
disorderly
unimportant really
there is nothing
but the buzz of crickets
to disrupt me.

the leaves look like paint
the world feels like a movie
it's outstanding.

i feel unreal
improbable
exhilarated
annihilated.

i feel caught
inside a 
rainbow bubble
set in motion 
by the breath
of a
young dreamer
unscathed
by the
cement midway.

A little Clarification...

To my last post.

Somebody sent me a response saying: "Did u write this?! It's beautiful. Except the whole thing about God." They then went on to "clarify" by  agreeing with me on the topic of learning via experience rather than simply relying on second hand recounts, which I feel most people would concur with. However, I got the feeling that the real message still was not quite being understood.

So, I responded:  "It's all about God... and nominalism and mind forged manacles of society and institution restricting perception. I absolutely agree that you learn more from experience than from a second hand recount in a book that is why I don't believe that you can rely on one entity, one god, one bible to dictate how you perceive these experiences. I feel like "God" consists of the the responses of every single living entity not just one omnipotent being, and definitely not just human beings. You learn more about good versus evil, etcetera etcetera, from personally understanding the natural intuitive interactions among things than you do when your simply told that something is right. Pages in a book aren't evolving or growing the words of dead men are barren. You can learn a lot of really important useful information from those sorts of resources, but the wisdom of man is limited whereas the wisdom of nature is in the entire make up of the universe. The light of man can be disputed and extinguished. The light of organic learning has no limitation because the world is constantly evolving, one can not argue with its function."
 

I'm no Metaphysicist, but when you put Jellyfish in Outerspace...

Maybe we should all buy bicycles and backpacks with lots of room and just quit our jobs and burn our text books to stay warm in the winter and at night? Maybe we should really learn something in a tree or a on a hill or in the river or on a rock by the sea watching all the animals go by and the daffodils dance their crazy cool sway in the breeze? I guess only knowing what other, mostly dead, people tell you is cool too? Maybe sleeping in houses and not tents isn't only cool in hurricanes and blizzards? Maybe walking around all day and night wandering dreaming with high aims in the clouds is crazy and not cool at all? Maybe i'm not just not very hip? I hate writing papers really. I like crazy rambling and using whatever words I want like crazy and cool over and over again and sometimes in the same sentence multiple times. I like not having to be standard and metaphorical and beautifully based. Sometimes it's nice to just be ugly. What is wrong with ugly and who say's it's ugly anyways? Who says everything has to make perfect sense and be perfectly ordered? Why does one word have to equal twenty when your saying the same thing really? What is up with MLA and APA and who says that "He says" isn't good enough for citation? Why is everything so systematic, meticulous, mundane, orderly, painstaking, boring, tedious, unexciting, sans joy and sans creation? Why do we have to be super warm in winter and super cool in summer? Why can't we just feel to a reasonable extent? Why does 85 suddenly become the new 70 just because it's 30? Maybe mountains make better homes for people than duplexes? Maybe minds are really just floating around creating worlds that really exist for artifice alone? Maybe I am God and maybe you are too? Maybe we should all build adobe homes and stop tearing down forests and move to the desert and then back again because one place is not everyplace there is to see and seeing is believing much more so than hearing?

I often wish I could evaporate into nature. Grow into a great oak. Experience the changing leaves first hand. Breathe in the dew filled chilled morning air. I've never felt more content disappearing into the unknown forest feeling found, lost in the wilderness.

Sunlight beating upon the dusty shoulders of old men
old desert men dancing
deer dancing spirits
prancing spirits embodied in time
time kept rhythm
rhythmic foot prancing
spirit dancing

Dual plane existence
objective resistance to material enhancements
personality stifling measurements
fitted goals cage
trapped resistance against walls
steel cage grey walls
Labyrinth trash fantasy world
Earthquake division
dark vs light
heightened awareness interconnectedness
Pocahontas faces in trees
Mother Nature Nurture Faces
Hands clasp twisted stream
at the base of tree bark lifestyle marking
flow against the current corrupted current
What is greater than this?
love nurture care teach learn
yearn grow fertilize multiply
Goals!
Purpose misdirected
measured with a yard stick
three feet across three feet wide
Recognized not realized.

Slip on down.

Spanish homework is my least favorite. I want to be a sky diving instructor some day. I want to splash a canvas with wet wet paint and strap it down as I fly through the sky and let the wind paint it's design.

I just got pierced again, snakebites. mmm.
I still don't know what to do with myself.
Hmm...Lately I've been thinking that I need a change.

outside industry
mainstream fish
hiphop dancers
baby bouncing mothers
skip skip hop scotch lollipop
12 years old on the fourth of july
blue jeans heart strings
dance dance bomb

Love is a little thing shaped like a lizard, it runs up and down and tickles your gizzard.

Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater.

No fun for anyone.
beguilement, betrayal, blarney, boondoggle, cheat, circumvention, cozenage, craftiness, cunning, deceit, deceitfulness, deceptiveness, defraudation, dirt, disinformation, dissimulation, double-dealing, dupery, duplicity, equivocation, falsehood, fast one, flimflam, fraud, fraudulence, guile, hokum, hypocrisy, imposition, insincerity, juggling, legerdemain, lying, mendacity, pretense, prevarication, snow job, sophism, treachery, treason, trickery, trickiness, trumpery, untruth,

abandoned, amoral, animal, carnal, corrupt, debauched, depraved, desirous, disorderly, dissolute, fast, fast and loose, fleshly, impure, in the fast lane, incontinent, lascivious, lax, lecherous, lewd, libertine, libidinous, lickerish, loose, lubricious, lustful, oversexed, profligate, promiscuous, relaxed, reprobate, salacious, satyric, scabrous, sensual, swinging, unconstrained, uncontrollable, uncurbed, unmoral, unprincipled, unruly, wanton, vulgar, dirty, lustful

Devil's in the Details

"Listen closely... the eternal hush of silence goes on and on throughout all this, and has been going on, and will go on and on. This is because the world is nothing but a dream and is just thought of and the everlasting eternity pays no attention to it." - Kerouac

So why stay hung up on any one thing for too long? Stay the wild negativity running rampant across the minds of millions of people across the world who refuse to accept their self as simple joy, collective purpose dream beings. And why should not it all be a dream? A waking dream life destined to die off with whatever memory you left in the minds of your friends, family, enemies. Why should we each have an individual egotistical purpose? Is it not enough to live and love and touch the minds of those around us? So why lie? A series of control mechanisms born to break down eventually. Born to stint progress and put a bad name on honest creativity, on honest thought. Why should life end only to be regained, born into a new caste system painted pretty by some people who don't know any better than you and I? Only this one is more lock and key, once your in your stuck no moving about. Once a pariah always a pariah! The slogan of heaven and hell, america too. But at least here we lie and let you pretend. Right?

Kerouac

I took this photo on the way to Tulsa a few years ago...

Kerouac

We should be wondering tonight, "Is there a world?" But I could go and talk on 5, 10, 20 minutes about is there a world, because there is really no world, cause sometimes I'm walkin' on the ground and I see right through the ground. And there is no world. And you'll find out.

...ill jump from the sky and land in the sea ill grow fins and dance with the waves when my time has come to its end ill wash up on the shore of some faraway place and lay my cheek to the sand and grow legs then stand ill wander around and drink dew from leaves ill make friends with the trees and as before my life here will end ill lose my arms and replace them with wings ill fly with the birds and sing their sweet songs...

Today...

is the first day as a google blogger and the end of August.
I'm not really sure what I want to do with this blog quite yet, I just feel as though I NEED to be thinking, writing, sharing, creating. It's been long sad while since I've felt creative energy running through my tips.